The Long Road

04/26/2004 Archived Entry: "Guest Column #7"

by dAN

Finally, I have broken free from the grips of the Raven's talon to flee its nest...

Four years. Four insufferable years at Carleton University (i.e. the "Raven's nest"). They're finally over! I recall envying students that were in 4th year back when I was in 1st or 2nd. I would think, "My, its still so far away till graduation. I wish I were in their shoes." Personally, I never wished for high school to end. If it were possible, I'd trap myself in a bubble and spend eternity reliving grades 12 and 13. University was clearly not the same. I didn't like it, and it clearly didn't like me.

I had a positive attitude entering university. I was a fool to think that my social life would improve. I guess I got what I paid for, an education, nothing else. No bonuses here. Even the few "friendships" I've managed to establish are bound to crumble, as I've seen stronger ones fall at high school's end. To add to my misery, I even had to take several courses during the summer. Yes, even the innocent looking Raven would do this to me...all because I switched programs from Software Engineering to Biochemistry.

Oh my, the Engineering faculty was HELL in itself. Originally when I applied, Aerospace Engineering was my second option. However, I realized programming wasn't my thing. I knew I needed a change. Normally, one would expect to fall back onto their second option. But after being around those prof's, TA's, and those "people", I decided to run. I ran till my legs pumped lactic acid. And then I ran some more, never to look back. In contrast to Engineering, Biochemistry was a pleasant change. At least in this faculty, the students acted "normal" and the girls, well, they looked like girls.

But Biochemistry was not easier in any respect. It was another beast in itself. Although it appeared furry and cuddly on the outside, it had a nasty appetite. It would tear away my flesh with its incisors at the first sign of weakness. It had no remorse. Haunting me through many sleepless nights, with assignments piled upon assignments and a multitude of exams. Then there were the labs. It wouldn't be that bad if I only had classes to attend, but along with scheduling work shifts, I also had to squeeze in an array of 3, 4, 5, and even 6 hour labs. In one term, they decided to weed us out by scheduling four lab periods a week.

Looking back, nothing was as bad as my last month of studies. Throughout the month I was either working at the pool or completing assignments. There was no time for anything else. I'm surprised I made it. Nevertheless, I would not have it any other way. It reminded me of all the challenging times and has allowed me to truly savour my free time. To savour my victory. That said, I do not look forward to my graduation. I consider this to be the end. I need not be part of some puppetry to tell me so. To join in some charade that will serve no purpose, but to trigger negative memories. Yet, at the insistence of my parents, it seems I have no other choice but to accept my diploma in person. After all, to them, this day will be adorned with positive memories.

It all comes down to one thing that I will truly miss. This single entity, which could make returning to Carleton University for another round possibly worth it. Those darn good four months of summer.

Replies: 5 comments

12 more months...

I empathize with your workload, for the most part, though I think I had a bit of a better social life in University; but that was mostly due to having lived in residence in first year. A very high percentage (90+) of the people I've made friends with are from rez. There's no opportunity to make friends in class unless you go out of your way, which I'm never inclined to. Had I stayed for Carleton/UoO, I expect that my circle of friends would have grown MINIMALLY from our HS bunch.

Posted by Rayne @ 04/26/2004 11:33 AM EST

Great entry :D I really wanna go outta town for Uni. now!

-Dave

Posted by Dave @ 04/26/2004 04:01 PM EST

the few people who i do know through classes (and i'm talking specifically about math and cs classes - i bear no grudge against people from my non-math elective classes) i tend to despise. i see them as the opposite of who i want to be.

which then makes it weird when i see them in an out-of-class setting. and there's more than a couple people where this has happened. i pretty much have to forget that i remember them from class at all. start associating them with this out-of-class setting as where i first encountered them (which is true for the most part since i don't really "encounter" people in class - i just watch and make fun of them in my mind)

Posted by shawnathan @ 04/26/2004 06:25 PM EST

Well writen Dan...you're still a bastard for being done though

Posted by Doug @ 04/26/2004 07:09 PM EST

being done isn't all it's cracked up to be.

i wanna go back! *pouts*

(although ... having a full time job with full-time pay is rather .... pleasant)

Posted by melpie @ 04/27/2004 10:10 AM EST