07/06/2006 Archived Entry: "unfairness"

There is a great injustice committed on a continual basis against us males of the species. It is savage, unrelenting, and unforgiving. It taunts us day and night, summer and winter (but especially summer). It knows we want it but through some arcane rule governing our society we can’t have it. Yes, I am talking about wearing tank tops!

Through some insane and twisted rule of fashion, it has become accepted that it is unacceptable for men to wear tank tops where they please less they commit a murderous fashion faux-pas. But yet!...YET! women of all ages and races can wear these same tank tops and remain fashionable! Lo! What unfair beast this be.

Having consulted the 3 usual suspects, it's 2:1 against tank tops in social settings. They're only okay at 1. Gym, 2. Beach, 3. Parks. Why? I dunno. It's just one of those mystical rules like socks and sandals. Two others, when asked, expressed the same concerns about wearing tank tops in non athletic/outdoor situations. Apparently it CAN be okay if you can "pull it off" or "dont take yourself too seriously". I'm not sure I know what those mean.

Gosh Darnit, there is nothing more comfortable to be wearing in the summer than tank tops! It’s all about having the scorching sun bearing down on your bare skin and the cool breeze winding its way through your hairy armpits!

Replies: 14 comments

You can't deny that women look better in take tops then men do.... Just think of the boobs. Alright, so that's a generalization, and not all women should wear specific kinds of tank tops, but I've seen quite a few men wearing stuff they shouldn't. (ie, why is it always the ugly, fat, smelly, old men who love to go topless?!)

Besides, there's that line there... women have many different kinds and colours of tanktops while men have "wifebeaters" - which are undershirts. Stick with a light button-down shirt with loose short sleeves.... you still get the breeze but you don't look silly.

Posted by Kathleen @ 07/06/2006 07:41 AM EST

Thai, you forgot this pro of tanktops : showing off your muscular shoulders.

Posted by Étienne @ 07/06/2006 12:36 PM EST

I dont mean wifebeaters, more this style: http://www.comycom.de/shop/images/gross/tatsync06.jpg

Posted by Rayne @ 07/06/2006 03:21 PM EST

He really means sleeveless shirts.

Woo, Thai's muscular shoulders. I'm not complaining.

I dunno, maybe armpit hair for men has become unacceptable..

Posted by Arshwana @ 07/06/2006 04:03 PM EST

I like tank tops. In Kazakhstan, we ware de tank top and beat dirty jew. High 5!!

Posted by Borat @ 07/06/2006 11:34 PM EST

i think it's definitely the armpit here thing - tank tops just leave it there - it can sneak out and then it looks like there's a spider crawling out from under your arm.

it would also be unacceptable in our society for women with unshaven underarms to wear the tank tops ... wait - does a statement like that make me a sworn enemy of the sisterhood?

Posted by melpie @ 07/07/2006 01:06 AM EST

> Apparently it CAN be okay if you
> can "pull it off"

I wear a wife beater or tank top sometimes when walking around campus after my workouts. How do I "Pull it off"? Well, if you're big enough so that when you walk near mothers and their children, the mother pulls their children a little closer...that's when you know you can "Pull it off".

Posted by P @ 07/07/2006 02:29 AM EST

Maybe its your crooked hat, fat lip, and bling bling that scares the mother and her children. I can't remember the last time society had a fear of muscles.

Posted by dAN @ 07/07/2006 09:32 AM EST

Society has a fear of anything that strays too far from the norm. 1 piercing is okay, 30 is not. 1 tattoo is okay, twelve on your face and neck are not.

Go look at Ronnie Coleman. And tell me you aren't scared.

Posted by p @ 07/07/2006 02:22 PM EST

Just shave your armpits!

Posted by Étienne @ 07/07/2006 03:41 PM EST

Oh, Etienne, you know waxing is the better way to go.

Posted by Arshwana @ 07/07/2006 05:25 PM EST

Wax? ouch. Shave, maybe....trim to a very short length, definitely.

Posted by Mike @ 07/07/2006 06:53 PM EST

Sorry P, looking at ripped guys isn't my past-time. And no, he doesn't scare me. I doubt you're straying so much from the norm.

Posted by dAN @ 07/09/2006 11:46 AM EST

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Posted by uV5kNgRNVK @ 07/10/2006 03:18 AM EST