The Long Road
Archives: December 2006
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Tomb Raider Legend: The best installment in the franchise this generation, revitalizing both the character and game series after a few abismal attempts and a couple of very bad movies.
Replay Value: Dozens of unlockable secrets, costumes, power ups, etc.
Fan Service: Having two costumes being nothing more than bikinis.
Masochists: Making the two bikinis the LAST items you can unlock after completing the game, beating time trials, finding all secret rooms, statues, etc.
Assholes: Allowing the bikini to only be used inside Lara Croft's house and not in any of the actual levels.
Long: downloads a saved game so he can have all the rewards with none of the usual effort.
Posted by Long @ 08:19 PM EST [Link]
Monday, December 25, 2006
"so you think they'll worship him?"
"sure, why not?"
"they hate jews"
"don't be so negative"
"they crucified him"
"we'll get them with guilt, it will compell them"
"fine, lets say we can convince them, what then?"
"well, we'll need some kind of celebration"
"right, like a mass for Christ"
"yes, a Christ Mass"
"we can set it around the same day as every other major religious holiday. To compete."
"oh! oh! I know! we'll call it Jesus Day!"
Posted by Long @ 04:19 PM EST [Link] [10 comments]
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
1. FictionJunction YUUKA – Akatsuki No Kuruma (Wheels of Dawn)
Originally heard as an inset song in Gundam Seed. Its rhythm and vocals were perfectly suited to the show’s more emotional moments and truly lent them a sense of gravitas. Never has a song been so well used to accompany a narrative. The first minute and 45 seconds are sad and lingering with minimal instrumental presence, then the song picks up pace with a wider range of instruments and manages to be both deeply sad and exciting all at once. Melissa described it best with one word: “pretty”. And no, I don’t understand what’s being sung either; but music is universal if you’re open minded enough.
2. Death Cab For Cutie – Soul Meets Body
Where have these guys been all my life? I first heard Soul Meets Body on the radio yesterday and was instantly hooked. It’s a catchy tune (especially the second half), that evokes an upbeat Simon and Garfunkel, and I can’t help but finding myself typing in time to the song. However, the true strength of this song lies in its lyrics which are full of imaginatively poetic imagery. Much like the lyrics, the music video is both wonderfully lyrical and whimsically literal and is a perfect interpretation of the line “a melody softly soaring through my atmosphere”.
While you're at it, check out the rest of my Youtube favourites.
Posted by Long @ 01:56 AM EST [Link] [11 comments]
Friday, December 15, 2006
1. Why must melissa always hug me using the male emoticon? This one: "({)". It's so unfair of her because then I have to hug her back with the female hug emoticon. It's very emasculating. And really, we're not functioning at optimal efficiency when she uses the White Male emoticon and I use the Black Female emoticon. No matter which one she uses, she's half right, but our total correctness output is only 25% if she uses the white male while it would double to 50% if she were to use the black female. Frankly, as an economist, she should have an apreciation for optimal system performance. That is unless she somehow values being white a lot more than she values being female...
2. Why is it that Phil always finds an excuse to show off his "big guns" on his blog and I haven't? This ends here. Of course I'm not as huge as he is, but we all know agility-based heroes are the ones who do real damage late game anyways. Strength based characters are only there to draw attention to themselves.
3. Why are all my conversations with "Inu Yasha" always so ridiculously funny? Does he live in some kind of bubblegum-pop world where all his conversations are filled with the same kind of senseless humour, or do we have a special combination of sick minds? We'll never know. A recent, and representative, example:
Inu Yasha: yo this girl just asked me out
Inu Yasha: on msn
Inu Yasha: and i turned her down
Inu Yasha: and shes freaking out
Long: was it MT?
Inu Yasha: and i need to study
Inu Yasha: no this girl here
Inu Yasha: what do i do?
Inu Yasha: block+delete? lol
Long: why'd you say no?
Inu Yasha: cuz i have standards
Inu Yasha: and while she excels in most
Inu Yasha: she fails miserably in the looks department
Inu Yasha: and im a shallow shallow guy
Inu Yasha: LOL
Long: what does she look like?
Inu Yasha: sec
Long: ask her for a picture
Inu Yasha: i have her pics
Long: and send it back
Inu Yasha: from facebook hold on
Long: and be like "would you date this shit?!"
Inu Yasha: LOL!
Inu Yasha: LOL
Inu Yasha: LOL!!!
Inu Yasha: *sends link*
Long: haha, wt..you just dont want her cuz she's fob
Inu Yasha: standards.
Long: send her to your fob post
Inu Yasha: hahahahahaha
Inu Yasha: oh baby
Inu Yasha: so mean
Inu Yasha: so mean..
Long: or like..photoshop a butt onto her face
Long: and send it back
Inu Yasha: hahahahaha
Inu Yasha: man ur so pro
Inu Yasha: at these things LOL
Long: i've been on GAF a LOOONG time
Inu Yasha: hahahahah
Inu Yasha: i dont even feel bad
Inu Yasha: rejecting her
Inu Yasha: does this make me a bad person?
Inu Yasha: like shes just a friend
Inu Yasha: same classes and we studied together
Inu Yasha: but i never thought she liked me wtf
Long: terrible
Long: yo guy, she looks like she'd be a freak in bed
Inu Yasha: LOL
Long: say yes, surprise her with the shocker, she'll never speak to you again
Inu Yasha: disgusting!!!!
Inu Yasha: LOL
Long: exactly
Inu Yasha: "ill go out with you only if you bleach your asshole"
Inu Yasha: then i dont go out with her
Inu Yasha: "i bleached my asshole for you!!!"
Long: "ew, why would i go out with yoU? you have a bleached asshole!"
Inu Yasha: hahahahahahhahahaha
4. Why?
Posted by Long @ 06:07 PM EST [Link] [24 comments]
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Princess Mononoke is one of my absolute favourite movies. It's the only one I have cravings to watch and the only one I want to force on other people. It pains me, then, that filmcritic.com’s sorry excuse for a film critic, one Mr. Athan Bezaitis, is one of the official reviewers polled for rottentomatoes’ score. It hurts me to my very core that his wrongheaded review is allowed to drag down this movie’s score to a measley 92%.
In a 568 word review, he uses 275 to bemoan the “complexity” of a plot that is fairly straightforward and then goes on to say that “the plot is actually a strength of this film” before criticizing other aspects of the movie.
“Based upon Japanese folklore, Princess Mononoke is the animated story of the war between the encroachment of civilization and the beast gods of the forest. While the forests are being devastated by the Tatara clan, producers of iron, the Great God of the Forest gives power to the other forest gods to protect their domain against the humans in the form of giant animals. Sound confusing? That's just the beginning.”
Does that sound confusing? It doesn’t to me. And I’m sure it doesn’t to most people with more of an attention span than your average goldfish.
Through it all, Bezaitis remains staunchly of the opinion that he knows best what kind of film audiences like; he has the gall to suggest something that no true film lover would ever even dare think about. He proposes changes be made for the movie to be more palatable to American audiences instead of allowing said audiences to discover for themselves a true masterpiece the way its author invisioned it.
“Unfortunately, his rep will not proliferate here in the U.S. without a few changes and some serious editing. The movie does have potential, but in its present state it's a disappointment that few will enjoy immensely.”
And of course, he is wrong. By and large, those who have had the chance to watch this movie have, in fact, enjoyed it immensely. It is the 113th best rated film on IMDB, placed 6th on Roger Ebert’s top films of 1999, and as previously mentioned, scores 92% on rottentomatoe’s poll of 62 critics (including Mr. Bezaitis). In the matter of Princess Mononoke, Athan Bezaitis’ opinion is objectively wrong.
Posted by Rayne @ 12:04 AM EST [Link] [23 comments]
Wednesday, December 6, 2006
Go here: http://rayne.woot.net/pix/China/
comments?
Posted by Rayne @ 11:56 AM EST [Link] [8 comments]
Monday, December 4, 2006
More than usual, I mean.
After getting up at 6-7am China-time for 3 weeks, my hours in Ontario are all out of whack. I've been waking at 6, 5, even 4am for the last week and crashing around 6pm and going to bed around 11pm. Add to this my new dedication to staying away from coffee (drinking expensive green tea, instead) and I've been living a really strange week.
It's gotten so bad that while watching the 10pm showing of The Fountain, a movie I've been anticipating for YEARS, I made the conscious decision to close my eye and take a nap. Luckily, the movie was engrossing enough that I didn't manage to sleep and was awake to be thoroughly confounded by its ending.
Will I ever go back to normal? Is this the shape of things to come? Is this it for Dota? Will my friends on the Pacific coast no longer have an Ontarian to talk to at all hours of the night? Come back next week, same bat-time, same bat-channel to find out!
Posted by Rayne @ 06:48 AM EST [Link] [3 comments]
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